Category: Things I don't get
July 11, 2008
I'm sure it made sense to someone at some time

Yesterday, I went to the camera store to buy an SD card. You see, my camera had chosen to crap out right before I went on vacation. So, I bought a new one. It came with a $20 gift card but you couldn't use the gift card until the next day. I waited to buy a memory card and ended up going to a different branch.

I told the salesman that I needed an SD card, and he said, "We're running a special right now. If you buy a 2-pack of 4GB cards, you get a free pedometer."

WG: "What?"




December 26, 2007
What school was that?

On my way home from work today I was listening to the radio. Voiceover guy announced, "We've got your prom theme in our playlist!"

Immediately, "Who'll Stop the Rain?" started playing.

Does anyone else think that prom sucked?




November 19, 2007
Way too early

So, the other day when I was all, "Yay, fall!" I spoke too early. It's in the 70s this week. The 70s.

Which brings me to another point. Two of the radio stations down here are already playing Christmas music. One is playing Christmas music non-stop and has been doing it since the day after Halloween. The other one seems to be playing it at lunch and during the evening rush hour.

Stop. Seriously. No Christmas music yet. Not until December, preferably not until after my birthday.




August 25, 2007
What's worse than drunk dialing an ex?

Drunk girl on cellphone, Glenwood South area, 8/24/07: OK Daddy, I love you. I have to go now because we're going into the bar. I'll call you later.




May 09, 2007
I hope some of you find this helpful

Yesterday I had 8 hits on my blog from people searching for "Matlock's favorite lunch". I, sadly, do not know, and have never blogged about it.

Until now.

My officemate assures me that the answer is hot dogs.




April 22, 2007
Proof that it at least caught my attention

The ice cream truck came down my street before. Playing "Battle Hymn of the Republic."

Really now, what says "ice cream" more than that?




November 12, 2006
For what it's worth

I don't know who decided to bring leggings back, but you did no one any favors.




December 11, 2005
No, I don't know why she bothered to ask

Girl at Pretzel Shop in Mall: May I help you?
Watergirl: Yes, I'd like the pretzel bites combo, please.
GAPSIM: What size did you want?
WG: Umm... I guess small.
GAPSIM: The combo is only available in medium.




November 21, 2005
Oh, in case you weren't aware

This weekend, I found a post of mine that had been copied and pasted onto someone else's blog, with no attribution to me (I'm not linking, because I will not give this person site traffic).   The work posted here is mine, not yours.  It is copyrighted under US copyright laws.  (Go here for an explanation.)  If you aren't clever enough to write your own stuff (especially a post about why you chose the career you are in) then perhaps you shouldn't have a blog. 




October 18, 2005
Unclear on the concept

We just received a hard hat.  In a box marked "Fragile".

I'm not taking that one. 




September 07, 2005
How does someone even come to this conclusion?

One of my co-workers just told me (we were talking about the aftermath of Katrina) that "Most people who are poor are poor because they're stupid and/or made bad choices." 

I couldn't even argue with him.  What could I say?  I know what I wanted to say, but it wouldn't change his mind. 




August 07, 2005
Why

... when I order a latte or a mocha made with skim milk, does the barista always ask, "Do you want whipped cream on that?"   (Note:  The answer is, "No."  I ordered it with skim milk for a reason.)




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