Last night I put up the Christmas decorations. (Well, technically, just the ones in the living room. Just didn't feel like getting all of them out this year.) I had to chase Orion around the living room and fish garland out of his mouth three times. This morning I caught him eating the plastic green roping on the banister.

Have I told y'all that Orion is stupid? Really, really stupid? I can't light candles in the house because he's set himself on fire 3 times. First time I thought, "Oh, he'll learn." Second time I thought, "Now he's definitely learned." Third time I thought, "Oh, he's not going to learn." Cdub and I once watched him try to eat the same piece of fuzz off the carpet 5 times. He' spy it, decide it might be food, put it in his mouth, and then shake his head to get it off of his tongue. Two minutes later, he would forget that it wasn't food, and repeat the process.

Last year I tried having real greenery in the house. I had white pine roping wrapped around the banister. He ate it and then puked it up for the entire 4 weeks it was there. Every day I had to clean up regurgitated pine needles. And the regurgitation of the pine needes? Was clearly not comfortable. So now the only real greenery in the house is the wreath on the door. Hence the eating of plastic and foil.

It's a good thing he's really, really, ridiculously good-looking.